Let go…


This isn’t going to be a long drawn out post. I’ve just been reinspired by Marie Kondo to let go of things I don’t love and I want to encourage everyone else to do the same. At this point I’m leaning toward being a minimalist and leaving hoarding behind in 2019.

I have three pairs of jeans. A pair of ripped mom jeans from Top Shop, a high-waist black jean with knee rips from Zara and I’m newly acquiring a straight leg high-rise Frame jean.

I mention all this to say that you don’t need 12 paids of jeans, if you’re not going to wear them. It not only takes up space in your closet, but your life too.

There’s a few examples here of different ways I wore the same pair of jeans. Stay tuned for an in depth post on how to style the same pair of jeans and where to grab them.

All my love,

Star

Guest User
Laser Hair Removal

I’ve come a long way. I woulda never posted a pic in a swimsuit, but now I am. Not because of body concerns, but because of my bikini area. This year, I took the initiative to start laser hair removal sessions at Laser Skin Wellness Center in Niles, IL. I was blessed to find therapist Malik, a woman that looked like me and understood my type of skin. She uses the Cutera Cool Glide Laser that is made especially for ethnic skin. This video is of my first session, but in the three sessions I’ve had, my ingrown hair problem has stopped, which I know a lot of women with thick hair deal with. Also, most of the hair growth has stopped. I’ve had three treatments on my underarms and Brazilian bikini area and I plan on  going to do about another 3 sessions. Not all women believe in hair removal and that’s fine, but I’m writing all this because I promised myself and my following to be transparent and helpful (with boundaries) in 2019. After I finish these sessions, I’ll do a maintenance session every year. I also plan on doing their Laser Genesis treatments. Laser Genesis helps with hyper pigmentation from scarring, skin evenness, large pores and more. Their summer deal is going till the end of August. Up to three sessions for $99 each and they’re usually $150 each…you basically can’t find that anywhere else...I’ve looked. I hope this helps someone.

What do you CTRL?

I’m just gonna leave this right here #sustainabilitybae #sza #popculture

…but keep scrolling

Let’s talk about the internet… Do you know where you get your internet from? Well, you get it from undersea fiber optic cables…

The undersea fiber optic cables connect the entire network society. 99% of digital communications come from submarine systems and not satellites. Like, forreal? I never knew that the whole world depends on these cables. Your phone calls, texts, emails, websites, wouldn't make it without them. My mind is blown. Stephen Malphurus, staff director at the U.S. federal reserve board was interviewed and said 'the financial services sector does not grind to a halt, rather it snaps to a halt' if in fact they disappeared, or stopped working. That’s a rude awakening and a wake up call for me. 
WTF LMAO

These undersea cables connect everyone. Its 223 international undersea cable systems and if they were to just disappear, only a very small amount of stuff would be backed up by satellite. My whole life and even until a few days ago, I thought the cloud was literally a cloud. I thought wireless meant literally that, wireless. Our whole world as we know it would change. To me, that means, no international calls, flights, or even easy domestic flights. We would easily be back to the stone age. Well, not the stone age, but definitely back in the days when we absolutely needed couriers. The internet would be effectively split between continents. 


Information about the networks has often been withheld in a strategy of security through obscurity. Some information is thoroughly notated because of the competitive market of the telecommunication industry. An engineer and manager at Australian cable station said that satellites are sexier than cables and that they switched to cables long ago, but still use satellites for branding. I watched this TED talk recently and forgive me that I don’t remember the name, but what stood out to me is ‘if we’re going to be wired, we should know something about the wires.” I’m like hell na. Honestly, truly….

Let’s talk about outdated technology and what that shit is doing to our beloved planet…


The outdated residue of computer monitors, printers, hard drives, power cords, phones and more, eventually reaches a new location. We call them waste sites or warehouses, made specifically for their disposal. Once we use up everything, we discard it outside city limits. Out of sight, out of mind, right? We live in “a crisis of production”. There is no way that production and consumption can keep up with disposal at the rate we consume. 

There are many stages and depots of disposal. The rubbish of electronics has to go through shipping containers, holding centers, stockpiling, recycling and salvaging materials, all before, it makes its final destination to become waste. Really, only a small percentage of e-waste is responsibly reused or recycled. A lot of what we think is responsibly recycled ends up in developing countries. Not to mention, we’re all guilty in the destruction of these so called developing countries. We’re responsible, whether we know it or not for the failing health and the danger we put locals while they extract the precious metals out of these devices. They’re poor people, so this is all by design. We’re exploiting them and we’re guilty of access and privilege. As sickening as it is, we are. We have developed as a world where only certain countries have access and certain countries produce our laborers. These workers risk their lives to earn a small living for our electronic gratification. They get sick and die, due to chemical exposure. We are all guilty, but can redeem ourselves by fighting for the US and maybe even the UN to have certain laws intact that force the community of e users to recycle. We can create a sustainability plan. 


Where do we start? It will take extreme planning, and extreme dismantling efforts to make a systemic and global change. There are so many ways that the internet and most electronics are interwoven. That too has be analyzed and then debunked. What it the impact of the current state that we’re working with? The impact is glistening waters, made from motherboard residue. While very beautiful, its toxic waste and whether beautiful on accident, or on purpose, what is it doing to the planet? I urge you to research the artist Agnes Denes, who planted ten thousand trees, in an effort to both salvage the planet, create commitment to the planet and make art that is memorable and aesthetically pleasing and the Highline project in Manhattan, New York, that transforms and urban landscape to a semi rural experience, where nature is no longer present.

None of these are the answers, but I think its a good start…especially with whats going on in the amazon. Sheesh


Guest User
How Can I LOVE Myself and Enjoy Life More?

Resting/Reading Nook

Last week, I posted pictures from my graduation from Dance at Illinois, the dance program at the University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana….The post mysteriously disappeared off my Instagram, so maybe I’ll repost it, but you can truly just take my word for it that I was fine as hell in my dress! At first, I was hesitant to wear it and a little uncomfortable in it, because, well… To be very honest, I never graduated from college before and I didn’t really know what was appropriate for the occasion. Ha! Anyway, I really didn’t have anything else to wear anyhow. So, shit, there my fine ass was at a graduation ceremony and on somebodies babies daddy’s Instagram feed in my little cute ass dress that FemiChic gifted me. graduating with a Bachelor’s of Fine Arts Degree.


Use code: CHIC for 15% off at Femi Chic!

Here’s the gag: I still have like a whole semester of credit hours to complete before I actually get a degree from the University. I met all the requirements of the dance department and I can finish my last 4 classes online, but, for transparency, I haven’t technically graduated yet. The finish line is so close yet so damn far away. I started my collegiate career at U of I in 2007. At this point, they need to just give me an honorary degree. I done ran up all the financial aid assistance I could get, and I don’t know how I’m gone’ pay for this last semester of unnecessary ass bullshit filler classes. I’m MF TIED! Fuck them courses. JK. I’ll figure it out. I always do.


The reason it’s taking me so long to get this degree is because my mom has been diagnosed with a terminal illness 3 times over the last decade. I decided to drop everything, so I could save my mother’s life. No cap! My mom was at the faux-ceremony on Mother’s Day, alive and well and proud as ever. So as much as I have to complain about, I really cannot complain about the decisions I’ve made to let my own ambitions take a backseat to my God-given gift to heal others, especially my mama. 


Lord, my family has been going through some shit. On the last day of my last Spring Break, my brother was arrested in a scandalous ass national headlines type of case. I’ve helped raise him for 24 years and his face was all over the news. I wanted nothing more than to crawl under a rock somewhere and just chill with SpongeBob’s best friend Patrick Star. Starfish, Starfish, yeah that’s me! I started getting all type of hateful ass messages and fake love when that shit happened. I’m still getting hit up about it. People we haven’t seen in decades and people out the country were looking me up to talk to me about it. It took everything in me not to drop out of school again and just be there with my mom through the fuckery. But I stuck in there!


It was rough. Especially after I misplaced the one thing that seemed to keep me focused and on task, a Law of Attraction planner. Granted, when I had it, I never really utilized it to its full potential. It’s really a cool planner, with activities and room to journal and all type of stuff in it. But I was only using it to keep up with my tasks. Well, how about I just found it the other day. And it occurred to me that I’m really good at faking the funk and appearing to have my shit together when in reality everything is coming undone around me.


Forget a Bachelor’s of Fine Arts, I’ve mastered the art of deception. If you’ve asked me how I’m doing lately, and I said, “Fine,” girl I was lying. I’m damn near losing my mind, actually. I haven’t had a job in a year. I’ve been neglecting my relationship, my friends, my passions and myself altogether. I’ve been in auto-pilot/savage mode. I’m traumatized and everything feels like a trigger. I don’t have space to keep holding everything in. I need to vent. Shit is hitting the fan. Everybody got me bent, and I’m trying to learn how to not break when I bend. I’m trying to learn how to say what I mean and not regret how it’s said. I’ve been on edge. If you follow me and think I have it all figured out, then you’ve surely been misled. It’s about time we all start spending more time exploring our true selves. 

Relax a little…

So I was flipping through my planner last night, and found this prompt: How can I love myself and enjoy life more?

The question hit me like a ton of bricks, and after sitting with it a while, here’s what I came up with:

  1. Do a few things for yourself at the top and bottom everyday. (I.e stretching, rehearsing..life of an artist)

  2. Eat healthy (as silly as it sounds, when I eat better, I feel the health).

  3. Don’t over commit.

  4. Say no if you don’t want to or cant. Don’t try to accommodate either.

  5. Do what’s best for you, even if it’s not best for someone else.

  6. Talk to people. Don’t keep it all bottled in.

  7. Plan and when things don’t work out, be flexible.

  8. Be alone. Write. Read. Take a walk in nature.

  9. Unplug once a week.

  10. Vacation at least once a month. (I’m reaching, but someday I’ll achieve that lifestyle)

  11. Lastly, don’t rush things that you’re not ready for. Take your time to find yourself. Be kind to yourself and others. They say growth lives in the uneasiness…so don’t go back to the old shit you used to do, once you ascend to a new level of consciousness. Period. When you make mistakes, hold yourself accountable, but don’t beat yourself up. And always remember that life will throw you lemons, but we make lemonade…. okay I wanted to add a lot more, but 11 seemed like a lot already.

Feel free to try some of my self care tips for yourself! And get the planner here

I would LOVE to hear your stories and ways you can love yourself and enjoy life more! Comment below!

All my love,

Star